“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”

Words penned by the psychologist Carl Jung in a letter to a Fanny Bowditch in 1916, replying to her request for clarification on a relationship. Had it been written this century, I am sure she may well have replied with – Umm, thanks, Yoda, but what the flip does that mean? I just asked you…

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When depression affects your relationship – setting the course to recovery

We all have our bad days when our lives feel out of control, and you wonder what’s the point. In fact, a recent study by the New Zealand Mental Health Foundation revealed that in 2020, 25% of New Zealanders reported feeling like they had “poor levels of mental and emotional wellbeing”. If you are in a relationship, this feeling may be fleeting as your partner says or does something to let you know that you are not alone, and they are here to support you whilst you find your feet again.

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What is “The Gottman Method?”

When you think about couple’s counseling, does it involve the following scenarios? You spend sixty minutes talking about how it was great in the beginning but now [insert long list of complaints], while the therapist nods their head. They then suggest a weekly appointment for the next six months. Your partner spends the entire session…

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Practical steps to heal from an affair

Working through an affair is tough. It takes tremendous energy and vulnerability on both sides. Drs. John and Julie Gottman have developed the Trust Revival Method, with three defined stages of treatment: Atonement, Attunement, and Attachment. The effectiveness of this model is being studied in a randomized clinical trial. I’ve watched hundreds of couples try…

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The Sex Starved Marriage

Physical contact is a powerful way to convey positive emotion and nurture your partners spirit.. there is simply no better way to communicate: “You’re not alone”, ” You’re important”, “I’m sorry” or “I love you”. Michele Weiner-Davis, MSW is an internationally renowned relationship expert, best-selling author, marriage therapist, and professional speaker. Among the first in…

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